Almond Butter Turkey Bacon Quesadilla

What a mouthful. What a delicious, delicious mouthful. I can't believe I ate this today. Oh God. It was too much. Too glorious. Too...

About 1½ tbsp raw almond butter About 1½ tsp agave nectar A dash of cinnamon A pinch of sea salt 1 strip of free-range turkey bacon 1 brown rice tortilla Butter or margarine (optional) 1. Mix the almond butter, agave, cinnamon and salt. Set aside. 2. Cook the bacon to desired burntitude, cut into pieces. Set aside. 3. Butter the tortilla and heat. (I cook on iron. Feel free to omit the buttering if you dont.) 4. Add the almond butter mixture and bacon, fold in half and cook until your psyche feels satisfied with the gesture. 5. Eat carefully.

Alternatively named: The Gluten-Free Heart Attack. I ate this with some fresh veggies and fruit in an effort to apologize.

Meat and starch is not a good combination for anyone who hopes to be kind to their digestive system, so it's not normally a thing that I do, but I had to try it at least once while all these things were in my kitchen. Hours later I still feel a bit greasy inside. Definitely not going to fry anything else for a couple days.

-♥A.H.

Turkey Bacon Stirfry

Stirfry is another thing that I make a lot, next to meal-sized salads. I like it because it takes so little time to cut up a few things, throw it in a pan, and make a quick escape out of the most intense room in the house. But when I'm not being taught my place, taking the time to cook something in a relaxed setting and put all my warm hippie love energy into it, is a thoroughly rewarding experience.

If you have the time and no one is blasting Praise The Lord from the next room, shouting racial slurs or shooting cats off the back fence, I would highly recommend cooking as a thing to do right after yoga.

Now let's talk about bacon.

For not being made of pork, turkey bacon is as much as I could ever hope for. I clung to it like a desperate rebound of a meatstuff, helping to compulsively distract me from the dismal emptiness of a great love's loss.

1/2 clove of garlic, minced 1 red onion slice, minced 2 celery sticks 2 mini sweet peppers 1 slice of free-range turkey bacon A handful of frozen green beans A handful of baby spinach Combine in skillet with about 1 tbsp coconut oil, salt and pepper to taste. Revel.

From the moment I opened the 'fridge, locked eyes with that glistening pile of raw turkey flesh, and envisioned its carnivorous goodness dancing to sexy 70s-inspired house beats inside my face, I knew it was destiny. A course of events was already set in motion, and it was going to end in bacon.

I stared down at the package, a proverbial Pandora's box now opened, exposing meatslab upon cold meatslab, to the unrelenting elements of the kitchen. For it was then I realized that within the week, I would be making more meat dishes, if I wanted to keep it all from going to waste.

My downward spiral had begun...

-♥A.H.